Apology

I'm sorry I have not been writing here.

I struggled with my devotional times this summer. After awhile, I joined a Beth Moore study on the fruit of the spirit, but I didn't even finish that. I got hung up the week we were to study faithfulness, because she kept talking about faith rather than faithfulness. It is very important to study and and learn and understand what faith is. Without faith, you can't be saved, so it is absolutely critical. However, the fruit of the spirit is faithfulness, not faith, and faithfulness is different from faith. Which is why there are two different (albeit related) words.

Anyway, I didn't know where to go with my consternation, so I stopped doing the study and I stopped going to it.

I started reading 1 John with my daughters.

I am also, finally, reading my brother's book on Revelation and taking notes (which makes all the difference).

Last night I got to discuss Habakkuk with my older son. That is an opportunity you don't get very often.

I feel dry, but I do keep going back to Psalm 63.

O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water. I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory.

Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you. On my bed I remember you; I think of you through the watches of the night.

Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me. They who seek my life will be destroyed; they will go down to the depths of the earth. They will be given over to the sword and become food for jackals. But the king will rejoice in God; all who swear by God's name will praise him, while the mouths of liars will be silenced.

I have felt dry, but maybe it was more that I was not in control of my devotional times this summer. And maybe I am not supposed to control them. Maybe it is OK.